Saturday, September 19, 2009

The Nutrimatic 5000

Baby food is one of those things, I can't imagine how ancient cultures managed without it. I know the Aztecs didn't have baby food, else somebody would've dug up a big pile of empty jars by now.

Baby food has benefits far beyond nutrition or convenience value. Like for instance? Thanks to baby food, long before it's time to buy school clothes, you already know what colors look good on your child.

My adult experience with tasting baby food comes from once having a toddler who apparently was convinced I was trying to poison him. Being helpful, I attempted to demonstrate how a mouthful of pureed Lima Beans can be a wonderful thing. That's when I found out where he might've got the poison idea.

On the other hand, I found the fruitish baby foods delightful, particularly the strained Peaches. That's the first time it occurred to me, somebody somewhere actually had a job running a strainer machine all day. Then they went home and complained about it.

It's still mostly the same way. It being 2009, the strainer function has probably been incorporated into the computer controlled Nutrimatic 5000. And oh yeah, the machine is in China of course. But other than that? Somebody still runs the thing all day, then goes home and gripes. Something like, "Yep, it happened again. Conveyor got overloaded, we were down for 3 hours. I told 'em, but nobody listens to me."

It's not only baby food, it's everything really. Like telephone poles for example. I mean, they don't just sprout from the ground (although I'm sure ADM has scientists working on that right now) somebody has to run a machine that turns logs into telephone poles. Then they go home and complain, along lines of, "Yeah, chain drive came off the orbital shaper again. I told 'em it was too loose, nobody listens to me."

Imagine that! Every object encountered in daily life, mailbox to flea collar to backhoe, must be several folks in the supply chain who work hard and feel like nobody listens to them. How sad. I wish I could get them all together, and say something that would comfort them. What would I say? Hmmmm... OK! Something like:

"People do listen to you. No kidding, serious efforts have been made not to, but no success at all. Ears stuffed with cotton, I-pods set on stun, standing next to the amps at Pearl Jam concerts, nothing seems to work. Your voice still comes in loud & clear. Just because people disagree with you doesn't make them deaf, you do know that, right? You are valued, it's just this particular idea of yours that isn't valued. Now, doesn't that make you feel better? Well, doesn't it? Hey! You weren't even listening to me, were you?"

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